Somebody asked me yesterday just why it was necessary to have a new translation of the Mass. In other words, I thought, why will we have to put up with:
St. Agnes' Eve - Ah, bitter chill it was!when we could have
The owl, for all his feathers, was a-cold;
The hare limp'd trembling through the frozen grass,
And silent was the flock in woolly fold:
It was the twentieth of January and very cold.
The owl was cold too.
And animals walked like differently-abled people on the lawn,
And the sheep didn't go baa.
Though, mind you, if somebody has been having fish and chips for Friday lunch for the last forty years, he might think it a bit over the top to change to tempura of gadus morhua, served with pommes frites epaisses, seasoned with hand-selected sea salt and drizzled with the finest vinaigre de biére.